Thursday, November 15, 2007

Brr(rrr).

I broke down tonight and had to put on a jacket when I went out.

(yes, I'm going to write about the weather. what's it to ya? if you don't like it, there are about 60 million other blogs out there from which to choose. the door's up there in the right hand corner. it's the little red square with the white "x". unless you're using a different browser...then I can't be sure what it is.)

I don't remember if it was last year or the year before, but I didn't have to reach for a jacket until the calendar read December, and I was hoping to hold out until then this year as well. But I walked across the street for a soda this afternoon, and the biting wind hit me so hard that I knew I'd have to add an extra layer when I ran some errands after work.

I drove past the bank, and the sign flashed "27ยบ" and I said to myself, "f-f-fff-ff-fffuuuuck!"

I remember when we used to have feet of snow by now, and winter brought snowdrifts so high they reached the top of the clothesline pole in my parents' backyard. These days, winters are so mild that if you pick the right days, you can hang laundry on those clotheslines in mid-February.

Not that I'm complaining. I'd much rather build a sand castle at the beach than a snowman. (not that I've done either for many many years.)

When winter arrives in our great state, I spend much of my time just waiting for it to go away. And it seems to go a lot more quickly than in the past. I think I can recall only twice last winter where we got dumped with enough snow that I found myself cursing my shitty tires for not being better in the white stuff. (not treadless tires, mind you...just, not Goodyears, either. can't wait to replace those.)

I pushed my luck when I wrote a column in mid-February '06 about the lack of snow, wondering aloud if we were going to get any at all that season. My column deadline is Monday morning, and we print and mail our paper on Wednesdays, which means most readers have that week's issue by Thursday. Guess how many feet of snow fell on Wednesday night and into Thursday? Guess. (I may be exaggerating a bit, but I'll go with about fourteen.)

Here's my name plastered all over this column, fearing the karmic boomerang for broaching the "where's the snow?" question, and half of the readers probably can't get out of their driveways because of the snowdrifts!

I found out that day that Mother Nature has a subscription to my newspaper. And a sick, cruel sense of humor. So I wrote a follow-up column the next week. Yep, two columns about the weather in two weeks.

I think I lost half my readers after that. Which cut me down to, like, three. (my mom, and two guys who promised to read if I paid for their subscriptions.)

My point is......winter's coming. And it's cold, OK?

When you venture outside, don't forget to put on a jacket. And a scarf. And earmuffs. And mittens. And bring some hand warmers. And wear wool socks.

Until next week, when it'll probably hit 62 degrees.


"A lot of people like snow.
I find it to be an unnecessary
freezing of water."
—Carl Reiner

5 comments:

  1. Man, I have a kindred spirit. Each and every year, I am the last person to don a winter coat. I don't even have own a fall or spring coat. It's winter coat or nothing - always has been.

    Every year, one of my attorney coworkers chides me with "Did you wear a coat today?" My usual reply is something like, "Nah, it's not even December yet." Or, "Nah, it was 36 degrees this morning."

    For the record, I've beaten you. I have yet to pull out my green leather Packer coat. And I haven't regretted it. So far, so good. We'll see how long I can go. It's getting close though. I've had to scrape the frost of my car window a few times. That's usually a sign.

    Somewhere in my class blog, most likely in Scott Jaklin's entry, you'll find a story from L.B. Clarke. Scott would walk past my house on the way to school. And one day he told me something to the effect of, "It's freezing outside. I've got on a sweater, winter coat, hat and gloves. And I see you pop out of the house wearing a T-shirt and no coat."

    Some things never change.

    Incidentally, come spring time, I'm usually the last one to take off my coat as well. I'll end up wearing it through April or something. Perhaps I'm just a creature of habit who fears change.

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  2. I've known you since the mid-80's.

    You are a creature of habit who fears change.

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  3. Wow, as of this comment, you have 15 minutes to get a new post in.

    Roll call! Gregg... Gregg...?

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